I read this comment on CL R&R and it made me think…and that’s always a bit scary;
Seriously. What a retarded, stupid, moronic discussion. Are you just a penis with a guy attached to it? No. You're a human being. I have women friends. Why? I like them. We have fun and talk and hang out. I have man friends. Why? I like them. We have fun and talk and hang out. Are you such a one-dimensional idi-fuckin-it that you can't understand that you are human first and male SECOND?
That's right, baby. It's just a sex organ. It's not your ontology. (Go look it up).
WHAT THE HELL; Can it be done?
Have you ever met that girl who hangs out with the boys and I’m not talking about the Tom Boy “girl” I’m talking about people like me I’m a girly girl, I have tons of girl friends and they are FABULOUS but I like hanging with the boys. Of course there are more me’s out there that like to hang with the boys, however everyone has their own motive for doing it, like the trigger comment above “I like them” could it be just that simple. I don’t think it is just that simple because if it were then there wouldn’t be 30 plus posts attacking the guy who said he won’t have girl friends as “friends”.
How many different levels of relationships are out there? Friends, friends from a break up, fuck friends, friends with benefits when not in other relations, friends from the old days, friends with attraction, friends who just like them, who really knows everyone has their own reason.
For me boys as friends goes back quite a few years however when I look back I honestly don’t see that I got a lot of really good relationships out of all this friends for whatever reason. Believe me I have listed a few and there are way more and I have to say I have very few friends left after the fact. Could this be truly because it can’t be done or is it just something I am doing…
Ever since I hit high school I found it much easier to just hang with the boys. The best reason for this back then was not so much “drama” now a days I can’t say that’s the same reason I hang with the boys because let me tell you they have their fair share of the “drama”. Shawn – I am talking about you!
Who knows if I can come to any conclusion to why most of my friendships have ended with these guys maybe it’s because of me or maybe the friendship just fizzled. However I bet if I really delve into this I would find a reason, however I don’t know if that’s what I really want out of this.
I didn’t just hang out with the boys I had girl friends and I went through lots of those too. However I have some solid ones by my side today. When I think back I remember tons of names with some wild stories that I dare not tell and then I think of name of some amazing people and think wow I wish I still had them in my life.
DM childhood boyfriend, turned school friend, turned nothing (I moved away)
CT, crush turned to a first kiss (I moved away)
CR, used to help him try and pick up girls, turned to my first real kiss
IS, tutor turned boyfriend, never heard from again
KO, I like to block this from my memory (not sure what that was…my first grad)
DB, boyfriend, turned friend, turned make out friend, turned friend with benefits, had kid with someone – we all move on.
CL, friend turned boyfriend, turned cheater, turned tried to be friends, turned hook ups as the years pass, turned random phone call up dates
KH, rebound turned biggest guy I ever met :O, turned talk to ever so often
SR, co-worker for two years, turned confident as his girlfriend fucked around with my boyfriend (CL), turned boyfriend, turned to going our own paths after a year, turned to friends for awhile, then gradually the phone calls didn’t get answered on my end and they stopped being made on his end
MB, co-worker turned friend, no attraction, always thought he was gay as never tried anything ever, was awesome to hang out with listened to me and gave great advice….drifted apart, random phone calls
SF, good friend, go shopping hang out, then he got married – don’t see so much anymore
MH, another (not sure what I was doing phase)
M?, word of mouth…
SC, co-worker turned friend, turned to finger licking good, turned to friends, turned to councilor, turned to friends most of the time, turned to friends that like to just hang out
PL – boyfriend period.
Hmmm, this really didn’t answer any of my questions at all, I was hoping to find a deeper understanding of myself and open new doors to new long lasting relations…who am I kidding I haven’t even listed half the people I know on this list this only proves…
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This blog makes me really wish we had put our heads together about C in the past. It actually makes me feel freshly mad if you can be mad about something from that long ago! I can't believe how shady he is and how much he really just thinks with his dick. That is why you can't maintain a friendship with that one. When he is happy in a relationship with someone else you won't hear from him but as soon as that wavers the slightest bit he needs the gratification that he would get from you or from me because he knows that we will always have a soft spot for him. It feeds his ego. Even if he doesn't want to hook up he just wants that feeling that you give him and he wants to know that the possibility is always there. But if you need him as a friend, really as a friend who you value and respect because you think he knows you well, he doesn't really want to be there for that shit unless he's getting something out of it. So I guess that makes him a fake friend. I don't think either of us really knows him at all. I hope that he eventually figures out that he can't treat his women that way (and I know he still is) cuz he's not gonna find anyone who will settle down with a shady cheating insensitive liar. And if he does then I wish him luck! God I can't believe him. Maybe he should just give up on the monogamy dream. LOL. Maybe not such a bad idea....
Okay. End of Novel. Sorry for the outburst.
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